A Loving Touch Therapeutic Massage

There are few more lovingly intimate ways of spending time with your partner than giving each other a massage. As a powerful form of nonverbal communication, massage can strengthen an already loving relationship and build bridges where there are problems.

Head

A head massage is one of the nicest gifts you can give your partner, especially if they have had a hard day, as it releases all tension.

Ask your partner to sit comfortably, while you sit or stand behind them. Take off jewelry that might catch on their skin, then place your fingertips on the scalp. Run your open fingers softly through the hair. With quite a firm circular motion, rotate your fingers around the scalp, changing the size of the circles and gradually increasing the pressure. Concentrate on areas such as behind the ears, along the hairline and the base of the skull.



Now concentrate on the forehead, gliding your thumbs from the top of the nose in an arch to the sides of the head and back. Repeat, following the line of the eyebrow, and adapt it by using small circular strokes with the balls of your thumbs. Next, sweep your thumbs gently down the sides of the nose and across the sinuses, then out towards the cheekbones before repeating.

Cup your hands into a loose fist and support the back of the ears with the side of your fist finger, using your thumbs to make small circular motions all around the rims. Then move down to grasp the lobe between the tips of your thumb and index finger and gently pull it down, allowing it to slip through your fingers before repeating.

Shoulders

A good place to start a full body massage is the shoulders and back, as these areas often contain the most knots and tight muscles! By easing the tension there, you pave the way for a totally relaxing and sensual full body massage - truly a great act of love.

Ask your partner to lie on their front. Put a small amount of massage oil on your hands and rub them together to warm it.



Start at the top of the shoulders with both hands flat on the skin with the neck between them. Run your hands up the back of the neck, then down and along the tops of the shoulders in long sweeping strokes. Repeat with a firmer pressure using your thumbs. Begin to focus on specific areas, gradually increasing the pressure, pressing your thumbs into the muscular areas using small circular strokes until you can feel the muscles loosening up. Punctuate the more intense circular strokes with the sweeping strokes to add variety and encourage relaxation.

Extend your massage down your partner's back. Place your hands flat on either side of the top of the spine and sweep down to the base. On the upward sweep, apply more pressure by using your bodyweight. Vary this stroke by sweeping your hands out to the sides using fanning strokes or a harder circular pressure with the heels of your hands. Avoid directly massaging the spine.

Breasts

Massaging a woman's breasts is a sensual experience for both parties. It is best done with the woman lying on her back. You may find it easier to straddle your partner, but do not sit on her. Begin by placing your hands palms down under each breast with your thumbs out to form an "L" shape and the breast cupped in the crook of the "L". Using quite the firm pressure, circle your hands upwards and inwards, bring the thumb and index finger together so that they end up lightly pinching the nipples before beginning again. If you want, you can concentrate on one breast, using a similar technique but this time with one hand following the other to complete the circle.



Another technique is to use your fingers and thumbs to pinch the nipple area gently before slowly fanning your fingers out across the breast. Use a light pressure around the nipple and increase the pressure as your fingers span out.

Thighs

It is easier to massage the thighs with your partner lying on their back, as they can bend their knees. Cup one hand on the underside of the thigh and the other on the top, just above the knee. Increase the pressure in the tips of your thumbs and fingers as you glide your hands up the length of the thigh and down again. Vary your strokes from feather-light to harder faming, using the heel of your hand to give pressure in a constant sweeping motion.



Buttocks

Sit at your prone partner's side and softly knead the buttocks with both hands, gradually increasing the pressure. Next, hold your hands above one buttock, keeping them taut, flat, straight and parallel, and use a sharp chopping motion to strike it. Use alternate hands and move up and down the length of the buttock.

Head Massage for Insomnia and Illness

Massage can give comfort to someone who is unwell accelerate the healing process, and for sleep-related problems it can relax 'the body and help the mind to switch off. These very different situations require different approaches.

Treating Insomnia
For chronic sleeplessness the underlying cause needs to be investigated, but generally most sleep problems are linked to stress and tension. When you're lying in bed and can't get to sleep, you can use head massage to ease body tension and hopefully induce calm and peaceful slumber. The strokes are suitable for both partner and self-massage.

To prepare yourself breathe deeply in and out from your belly, perhaps letting out a sigh or a yawn on the out breath. Then let your jaw drop so that your mouth is partly open and your tongue rests softly in it. Roll up a small ball of saliva in your mouth and keep it there - higher levels of body fluid are associated with deeper states of relaxation. Keep your eyes gently closed, making sure that your eye sockets remain soft. Keep your mouth moist with saliva.

1. AS you breathe out, firmly squeeze the middle back of your neck with one hand. Hold the pressure for 15 seconds and slowly release. Repeat at the top and bottom of your neck. Cover the neck area three times and repeat on other side.
2. Still lying on your side, use your thumb to press into the base of the skull in the area just behind the ear. Continue pressing, moving down along the skull's ridge to the hollow in the middle of its base. Stay longer in any particularly tight or painful spots. You can also make circular strokes here with your thumbs. There are many pressure points along this area that can help to promote restful sleep. Turn your head and repeat on the other side.
3. Now lie on your back, and use your fingers to make circling strokes around the jaw area, paying particular attention to the jaw socket. Use stronger pressure here if you wish. As the jaw benefits from repetitive work, keep this action going for a few minutes. As you massage you can listen to the soothing sound of your breath. Alternatively, breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth to encourage repetitive, sleep-inducing yawning.
4. Turning your head slightly, place your index finger at the top of your upper ear. Slide it down to just below the ear's top outer ridge and across to the edge of the dimple in this ridge. Position your thumb so that it is resting on the underside of the ear's ridge, just behind your index finger. Press firmly and use your finger to massage in a circular movement for about 30 seconds. This special pressure point is associated with calming the mind Repeat on the other ear.
5. With your head back to centre, place your first two fingers in the middle of your forehead and make slow circular strokes using a light pressure. Continue with this circling action and work out towards your right temple, making the circles bigger as you go. Circle over the temple area and then use connecting circular strokes to move to the left temple. Repeat once or twice more. This stroke also calms the mind and slows down thinking processes.

Head Massage and Illness

During illness, a traditional style head massage would be over-stimulating and could feel invasive. The body's energies are taken up with crying to get well and in these situations a different kind of approach is called for. A gentle hand massage that uses light and tender strokes, however, can be healing and soothing to receive and also speed up recovery. This type of massage can be used during convalescence but not during acute conditions'. Before massaging anyone who is unwell, observe the usual contraindications; if you have any doubt then check with a qualified medical practitioner. As a general rule guide, remember to keep your touch light and gentle and avoid firm pressure. The strokes should be fluid, smooth and flowing and stop when your partner has had enough.

Hand Massage

A light hand massage can promote healing and relaxation throughout the body's systems without being too vigorous. Pressure points on the hand have physiological correspondences to the rest of the body, there are also nerve receptors located here which will send messages of relaxation to the brain.

1. Gently sandwich your partner's hand in between your hands and then use your top hand to stroke downwards in the direction of the fingertips. Next, take each finger at a time and stroke down to the fingertip. Repeat on each finger three times. Repeat on the other hand.
2. Next, move your hands to the arm and make circling actions with your thumbs, working round the muscles of the arm, then the joints of the wrist and hand. Make your touch increasingly light as you move down the arm. Do this three times and then change to the other arm.
3. Using your thumb pads, make small circular strokes across the whole palm at least three times including the wrist area if you wish.
4. Make light circular strokes over the front of the hand, working gently into the wrist and down the arm and smoothing between the fingers. Finish with gentle stroking and a hold. Repeat on the other hand.